Digging Holes
This post was never planned, thought-out, procrastinated, or saved as a draft. It just sort of happened.
I’m going to try to communicate a thought; a simple idea really. Hopefully, a little glimpse into my tiny box of a life will somehow be a revelation that inspires and challenges you. And if skimming is your thing, you should probably stop here, as you most likely do not posses the ability to read through a post, much less read into it.
The fact of the matter is, right now (in the greater scope of my life), I am doing something that I’m rather good at, but I don’t enjoy doing. And that’s school. (Which is another story for another day). I know some rather brilliant people in academia that I have the upmost respect and admiration for, but it’s rather absurd that in the 21st century, we can continue to deceive ourselves into believing that there is a single ‘one-size-fits-all’ approach to learning, and that every single unique being learns the exact same way.
Yes, it would convenient if we all did, but we’re human beings—not robots.
So I find myself doing the same kind of mindless rhetoric that has consumed so many other lives. I find myself doing the same thing I vowed I would never fall into. But alas, as humans, life isn’t always about doing what we love, but also doing what we have to do to get to where we want to be.
And then it occurred to me: I don’t have to do this forever. In a mere six months I will have graduated high school, and be free1 to do whatever I want to do. A mindblowing and daunting thought for a sixteen year-old, I assure you, and a responsibility that my hands still tremble at the thought of.
The point is that one day—in the very near future—I will not have to do anything. I will complete the mandatory part of my life, and will be able to make my own choice as to what I want to pursue.
Now, the million dollar question: what do I want to pursue?
Just for a second, I am going to imagine that there are no restrictions, no limitations, nothing that holds me back from doing whatever I want. Even so, I feel like I have set before me, thousands upon thousands of premade holes to choose from. All of them have their own labels that are very admirable in their own respect: from saving lives, to walking on Mars, to running a Fortune 500 company.
Most people spend the next 10 years of their lives jumping from hole to hole—trying to find one that fits them ‘just right’. There is the occasional person that knows exactly what they want and jumps right into the hole where they belong—but that is a rare, rare, occurrence.
The problem is that I know what I love doing. I know the tools I love using. I know the things I’m passionate about. But for the life of me, I cannot find a hole that fits me.
And with billions of unique individuals on the earth, and only a couple thousand careers, shouldn’t it be more common? Shouldn’t more people try to mold a career around them, instead of mold themselves around a certain career?
Now, the two million dollar question: am I allowed to dig my own hole?
Am I allowed to create a career that is custom-made for me? It is neither better nor worse than your career, because it’s mine. You probably wouldn’t find it interesting, fun, or desirable—and you shouldn’t. Because it’s mine. Not yours. You can go dig your own.
Maybe that’s why I’ve never been able to answer the “what do you want to be when you grow up” question. Ask me what I love and you better grab a hot beverage, as I’ll go on for quite awhile. But ask me to pick a career and I will freeze. Because there are none. The only career I want to pursue is the ‘Michael Mistretta’ career, which I’ve put a lot of thought into, but haven’t gotten around to creating yet.
Increasingly, I long to be able to communicate stories in a language I cannot speak. Some way to directly connect to people’s hearts through words, photos, or for that matter, media of any kind—bypassing language and cultural barriers, and offering something deeper than petty emotion2.
As you can probably tell, my hole isn’t very deep yet. I have some more digging to do. You should probably go too.
